How'd All That Stuff Get Under There??

Last weekend I moved around the furniture in our master bedroom. Vacuum cleaner at the ready, I expected to see dust build up and hoped to locate a missing remote in the far recesses under the bed. When I removed the mattress and box spring I discovered... so much more than expected. Certain the impact would be much less stunning simply retold to my family, I decided this one needed proper documentation... and proof I wasn't making it up.

In a perfect world and with the help of a obsessive compulsive domestic employee, the floor underneath the bedroom furniture would be vacuumed weekly preventing the accumulation of dust and other debris. In reality... it is much less maintained, more cluttered and for the purposes of this post...much much more interesting.

I laughed and photographed and then listed everything I saw under our King Size Bed.

I am not making this up.

3 pairs of shoes
9 socks
2 Rand McNally Road Atlases
2 hardbound world atlases
2 shotguns
1 rifle
1 (2009) stake directory
1 roll of purple curling ribbon
1 plastic cup
5 empty water bottles
1 baseball cap
1 elastic headband
2 empty tic tac containers
1 crocheted pot holder
1 nerf gun bullet
1 hair barrette
2 highlighter markers
4 pencils
2 pens
1 ipod cord
1 exercise hand grip
1 phone book missing the front cover
1 bottle of eye drops
1 pony tail holder
1 spoon
4 paper clips
1 pocket knife
1 movie ticket
1 bat
1 bottle cap
1 card board tube
1 fortune cookie fortune
1/2 of a corn chip
1 eye glass case
1/2 a pair of flip flops
1 DVD front cover
1 Knotts Berry Farm Pass
5 green fluorescent air soft bb's
A penny and a nickle
1 Faded Glory jean tag
2 spent bandaids
4 broken pretzels
1 computer screw
1 book
1 pillow
1 eye mask
Dust
and 62 gum & candy wrappers

Here's photographic proof.